I have a book called “We Got Fired (and it was the best thing that ever happened to us)” and it details the stories of 29 big name people who got fired, picked themselves up, learned something, and went on to succeed elsewhere after getting canned from a job.
Last week I talked about needing both fear and hope in order to succeed. But what about when there’s only fear? Those times when you fail and there seems to be no silver lining to it. When you feel despair.
Let me just say first that there’s no life that doesn’t include suffering. This is the human condition, and accepting this reality helps you endure when it inevitably comes. There’s no career or job that doesn’t include suffering.
I’ll also add that I can’t think of a highly successful, mature, business that I work with that hasn’t gone through an existential crisis. By that I mean, the business is in crisis and facing bankruptcy or a severe shake up. Like not being able to make payroll and wondering if the doors will close within 3 months.
That means that there are people running the place who are under extreme stress.
If this resonates with you, here are some thoughts for you:
Success is a lousy teacher. It only teaches you to be proud and gives you the false assurance that you can’t lose. Failure makes you coachable, and teaches you to listen to others and make adjustments so it doesn’t happen again.
You only lose if you don’t get back up again. Years ago I gave a (paid) talk that turned into an embarrassing disaster. I was under prepared and I literally froze partway through. I couldn’t think of what to say next as a room full of eyes bored into my forehead. I was so embarrassed. I felt sick and assumed that I should do something other than speak to groups in the future.
Then I heard the story of Rodney Dangerfield who bombed an important comedy set. Bombed. He fumbled and was nervous and had been drinking too much. He put his very best out there and it got swatted back in his face. The club didn’t want him back. But instead of quitting like I wanted to do, he begged the owner for another chance, made adjustments, came back the next night and killed. When I read his story I decided that I’d try again too. You have to get back up and keep trying.
Success isn’t built on winning. It’s built on failure. It’s built on feeling sick at heart, wondering if it’s worth going on, soul searching in the middle of the night. This is the ground that incubates successful and wise people.
How do you achieve success? By making good decisions.
How do you make good decisions? By developing good judgment.
How do you develop good judgment? By making bad decisions.
There’s no one anywhere that hasn’t felt the sting of failure.
So, if that’s where you’re at today. Don’t quit. Make adjustments. Learn. And keep showing up.
“Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm” – Winston Churchill
